Difficulty Blogging

I'm finding it difficult to come up with themes, symbols, and quote importance at this part of the novel. I don't think I understand the importance of Amir's marriage to Soraya yet, or the fact that Baba passed away. The beginning of the novel was so much easier for me to pick things out, and now that Amir has begun his new life, I've been stumped on what to blog about.

I hope that in the near future I am able to see what the purpose of this part of the novel is, because I am anxious to find out what happens. I have forgotten a lot of the movie when I watched it, so I can't wait to find the importance of Amir's adulthood.

Quote Importance

When I first started reading The Kite Runner, I found many things very interesting on the first page of the novel. The reader is introduced into a character's life that seems to be unfulfilled and full of regret and sorrow. One thing that I found particularly interesting, and thought that maybe it would be important later on, is the quote,

"That was a long time ago, but it's wrong what they say about the past, I've learned, about how you can bury it. Because the past claws it's way out." (1)

This is the quote that I used in my blog title, hoping that it would be somewhat useful in finding a thesis and various themes. I have finally come to realize that it is a huge part of the novel, and I couldn't be any happier that I chose to use it.

The quote is used as foreshadowing for the reader that there will be something that Amir wants to move on from, escape from, bury away. We are now aware that what Amir said at the beginning of the novel is right. No matter where you go, what you do, and who you try to cut out of your life, the past will come and find you and those people will never really be forgotten.

Amir and Baba move to California,

"For me, America was a place to bury my memories."

Amir thinks that burying his memories will make all of his guilt, anger and regret will just disappear because he moved to another country, never to see anyone from Kabul again. That's not how the past works though. The past claws it's way out.

In the previous post I mentioned how Amir and Baba go out for dinner and celebrate Amir's graduation. Baba mentions that he wishes Hassan could have joined them that night, and Amir's heart breaks at the sound of Hassan's name. Amir thinks that Hassan is forgotten and never to be spoken of again, but he is terribly wrong...

Recurring Guilt

Among the many things that Baba and Amir came to America for; new and better life, opportunities, freedom, there were ultimately two things that came out of their move to the United States.

"For me, America was a place to bury my memories. For Baba, a place to mourn his." (136)

Unfortunately for Amir, the past is still coming up from time to time, and even though he wanted to forget about his wrong-doings and move on with his life, the guilt from his past still haunts him. On the night of his graduation, Baba said something to Amir that had made everything worse.

"Then Baba rolled his head toward me. 'I wish Hassan had been with us today,' he said. A pair of steel hands closed around my windpipe at the sound of Hassan's name. I rolled down the window. Waited for the steel hands to loosen their grip." (141)

"Kabul had become a city of ghosts for me. A city of harelipped ghosts." (144)

The theme of guilt still has not ended, which makes me wonder when it will, or if it will last a lifetime, like Atonement. Amir's actions are still eating me up inside. I'm so frustrated that he never saved Hassan from Assef and his friends.

Check-In Two: Guilt

I'm through one third of the book now, and I couldn't be more engaged and excited to read more. I've seen the movie and thought that it was fantastic, but it's true what they say about the book - it really is so much better. I had forgotten certain elements and details that may or may not have been in the movie, but that's what makes the book so much better; you know every detail, every thought, and every feeling of the protagonist. It includes small, seemingly pointless (but we know better) details of Amir's life, whether it be events, thoughts, feelings or actions. The reader is emotionally attached to the characters in the book, more so than in the movie interpretation.

I feel like I have a bond with Hassan because I can relate to him in so many ways, and naturally the reader feels compassion and sympathy for him. I, like Hassan, have gone through abandonment and betrayal and know how terrible he must feel. Although I was never in a servant position like he is, I have had friends turn their backs on me when I needed them the most, just like how Hassan needed Amir in that alleyway. Friends have picked sides during fights, left me hanging when I needed someone to talk to, and in some cases, attempted to turn the whole world against me. In some ways, I feel like I'm still searching for that one best friend that every kid/youth has growing up that they remember forever. Hassan is close to my heart for that reason and I have to keep reading because I forget what happens to him in this part of the novel when I watched the movie. It's terrible that Hassan has to live with that memory for the rest of his life.

On the other hand, I have recognized a couple quests emerging within the novel so far. One being Amir's quest for his father's ultimate love, affection and approval. Amir knows that his father will never get over the fact that Ali and Hassan left with no explanation and has a hunch that it was Amir's fault. Throughout the novel there are constant references to Amir's frustration and sadness that his father doesn't love him the way he thinks he's supposed to (used in previous posts). Even as an 18-year-old travelling to Pakistan with his father, Amir feels like he lets his father down.

"Baba grumbled something under his breath. I wanted to tell him I was sorry, but suddenly I was salivating, the back of my throat tasting bile. I turned around, lifted the tarpaulin, and threw up over the side of the moving truck. Behind me, Baba was apologizing to the other passengers. As if car sickness was a crime. As if you weren't supposed to get sick when you were eighteen." (117)

Amir constantly feels not good enough for his father and feels like whatever he does is a disappointment to him. Except for when Amir won the kite-fighting tournament. The praise and attention would never be the same.

Another quest taking place is one similar to Atonement. I've found that Amir and Briony are very similar characters and have the same conflicts within each text/movie. They each made a bad decision that they thought would only effect themselves, but ended up effecting everyone around them.

Briony told a lie that she didn't have to tell. She didn't have evidence - never saw who the "rapist" was, but in the end, she got the wrong man in jail.

Amir could have stopped the rape of his best friend, but instead chose to watch and run away.

Both of these decisions had considerable effects on each of the people betrayed - Robbie and Hassan.

In Atonement, Briony didn't realize that Robbie would be put behind bars and it would be all her fault that her sister Cecelia lost her true love to a lie.

In The Kite Runner, Amir didn't realize that it would be so hard to live with Hassan after he watched him get raped by the boys in the alleyway. Ali and Hassan end up leaving Baba and Amir's home because it is so hard for Hassan to live there anymore; his embarrassment, shame, disappointment in Amir, and discomfort within the home. This effects everyone in the house, even the boys parents, Ali and Baba.

Now, Briony and Amir both have to live with what they've done and attempt to move on with their lives, despite their terrible mistakes as children.

In Atonement, Briony goes to school to become a nurse. The symbolism of Briony going into nursing is that she is trying to make other lives right, because she knows that she ruined other ones.

On the other hand, in The Kite Runner, Amir tries to run away from his problems in the beginning. He does not begin to try to cope with his guilt. Instead, he pushes it aside and hopes that it will never escape the back of his mind again.

And in the end, when the protagonists are ready to confront their guilt, it appears that it is too late.

Briony wanted to apologize to Cecelia and Robbie, but when she went to their home she found out that they had died.

Amir has the same painful discovery when he realizes that Hassan died during the Revolution in Afghanistan, and that he never did get the chance to leave the country to safety; but maybe he could of if Ali and Hassan stilled lived with them, like they should have.

These works have many similarities. It's interesting comparing them and the same "confronting guilt" theme that they both have.

My overall impression of the book has been great. To be honest there haven't been a lot of books that I haven't liked reading in school, the teachers seem to always pick great ones for us to read (except The Chrysalids). As I have said before, I've enjoyed the relationship that the reader gets to make with the characters because of the vivd details in the book. I've really liked the story-line and plot so far as well, although I've only really read Amir and Hassan's childhood and the beginning of the Russians coming into Afghanistan. Amir and Hassan as children was great to read about, because it brought up old memories of my childhood as well. I couldn't be any happier with my book choice.

Listening to: "The Cave" by Mumford & Sons, "We Used To Wait" by Arcade Fire

Worldly Location

Five years later, the Russians have invaded Afghanistan and many residents have begun to leave the country as discretely as possible. Many refugees have decided to relocate to Peshawar, Pakistan. As you can see, the journey that Baba and Amir make from Kabul to Peshawar is a long one, especially inside of a fuel tank. Kabul is more northwest of Peshawar, which is on the right of the map, more Southeastern.

The End of The Beginning

I've come to the end of Amir and Hassan's childhood, where Ali and Hassan leave Kabul to go to Hazarajat. The last forty pages I've read continuously and could not stop, and I even cried reading some of them. What Amir has done is so terrible, but it doesn't just stop there. Amir continues his ruthless ways by outcasting Hassan, refusing to play with him, speaking to him rudely and purposely avoiding him. The one thing that broke my heart was at Amir's birthday party when Assef showed up with his parents and a gift for Amir. His fake manners and charming attitude disgusted me and I found myself emotionally torn up. Assef tries to seem like a well-mannered gentleman to Baba and Amir sees right through it. Amir's emotions seem so real and so upsetting that I felt like I was Amir. At the party, Hassan is supposed to be serving drinks to all the guests. Amir sees Hassan serving drinks to Assef and his friends and feels so ashamed. There are a couple quotes that stand out to me around this time in the novel.

"Everywhere I turned, I saw signs of his loyalty, his goddamn unwavering loyalty." (94)

"Hassan's not going anywhere. He's staying right here with us, where he belongs." (95)

"My stomach was turning at the sight of my father bonding with Assef." (102)

"In one of those brief bursts of light, I saw something I'll never forget: hassan serving drinks to Assef and Wali from a silver platter. The light winked out, a hiss and a crackle, then another flicker of orange light: Assef grinning, kneading Hassan in the chest with a knuckle." (106)

"Either way, this much had become clear: One of us had to go." (108)

"Hassan knew. He knew I'd seen everything in that alley, that I'd stood there and done nothing. he knew I had betrayed him and yet he was rescuing me once again..." (111)

"I watched Baba's car pull away from the curb, taking with it the person whose first spoken word had been my name." (115)

Each of these quotes had a significant meaning to me as I read this last part of Amir and Hassan's childhood. It makes me sick how Amir is acting, my stomach turned as I read what he had done to Hassan. Breaks my heart.

Book Cover Importance

I've finally figured out what the significance of the book cover is. I've come to the part in the novel where Amir and Hassan win the kite-fighting tournament, and Hassan goes to run the blue kite. It just so happens that the blue kite belongs to Assef. Hassan gets the blue kite, but gets chased into an alleyway where Assef and his friends beat and rape Hassan. Amir doesn't step in to stand up for him, he just peaks around the corner of the alleyway. The book cover is Amir peaking around that corner, but not helping Hassan, even though Hassan went through all of that just to bring the kite back to Amir. This part of the book was approximately twenty pages, and I just couldn't put it down. It's so terrible and heart-breaking. This book cover symbolizes the event that will change Amir and Hassan's lives forever.